The opposite of 'Gone, but not forgotten'

I used to blog on a regular basis. It was a fantastic way to journal and share what was going on in our lives with family and friends when we lived far away. Being a stay at home mom and raising littles gave us plenty of things to share and no shortage of entertainment factor.

Since relocating back to my beloved hometown and being surrounded my a majority of our loved ones (and while our lives got exponentially busier), I got away from blogging. I also went from a stay at home mom to a working mom.

However, after all this time, I didn't lose my desire to write. I just lost my free time by entering the work force and getting busier with life, parenting, Cub Scouts, etc.

I'm still here. Still waiting for SOMEDAY to come.

Still trying to balance housework, family and health. (Although, since moving here, I finally figured out how to make MYSELF a priority on the totem pole. It took me six years before I took time to exercise. I love attending a weekly yoga class.)


Something in my life that truly DOES fall under the 'GONE, but not forgotten' category is my ability to use my right arm in a functional manner. I go in for botox injections on a regular basis now so that the neurologist can tone down spasticity due to MS. Without it brought intense pain where my right shoulder dropped and it physically hurt to breathe.

For a month or so, I've been unable to physically lift my right arm into the air  as if I have a question, or to raise it from the two o'clock position to the twelve o'clock position. It just won't go. Sadly, I am unable to retrieve dishes of food from my over-the-stove microwave, reach my garage door opener from my car visor, or accomplish basic yoga moves. It takes two hands to put on mascara (as I have to use my left hand to raise my right elbow above shoulder high). Sometimes, I even need two hands to brush my teeth.

I'm getting quite good at using my left hand to get jobs done or to assist my right in it's mission(s).

I continue to wait for my arm function to come back while I WAIT FOR A CURE for MS.

I want to...

I want to...

write a book
enjoy snow-shoeing with my family
take a relaxing vacation that includes a sandy beach, an umbrella in my drink and a book in my hand
take a polar bear expedition in Churchill, Manitoba
dance with my boy(s) at their wedding(s)
have financial security so that I can spoil my kids and grandkids the way our parents spoil us

Anatomy of a Guard Mom

I have often been the KEEPER OF THE CAMERA and subsequently, NOT IN PHOTOS. We've got oodles of pictures of my husband with the kids, but very few with THE MOM photographed along-side her kids.

Years back, I made a conscious effort to start using the self-timer more so that I could be in SOME of the photos that we take. I also TRIED to take selfies with my kids, reminding myself that even if it isn't perfect, it is FAR BETTER than no memories.

So, I just went through our digital photo album in search of FAMILY OF FOUR pics and decided that I wanted to continue looking for MOMMY TRIO pics. Alas: a collection!


https://photo.walgreens.com/store/share?via=link&token=68pGxdXNOHqSCRoy64000g/SFO/1001938573060/WALGREENS

Pain and pressure, intensity of color in left eye

Called the neurologist today because I had suffered from pain and pressure behind my left eye for most of the day.

Tonight, with my glasses off and one eye covered at a time, I noticed that my right eye looks normal - with colors warm and rich. My left eye makes the walls have a grayish greenish cast instead of the warm light cast.

I'm getting worked in for an appointment with the eye doctor tomorrow afternoon.

Fingers are crossed.

2017: Nov 28 Letter to Grandpa

Nov 28, 2017

Deer GrandPu,

Thak you For SPenDin

g Time With SYDNey 

anD I. I cant Wate 

until you Can visit 

us agen Becus We 

hav so much f=un with 

you. DiD you enjoy 

Pass The Pig, go Fish, 

or Batel shiP The 

most of all? 

from, SilAs

(age 6)

When his lowercase A's and G's are typically backwards and letters are randomly capitalized throughout. {love this.} Took pics of it before it goes in the mail because he addressed the envelope himself, too.... and they might have a hard time reading it at the post office. (He tried SO HARD!)

For the record, we were going to write "We forgot to go to Culver's for Pumpkin shakes with you" and "we enjoyed some of those on Monday after school" but Silas got teary-eyed and announced "We can't tell him that; that will make him feel bad that he didn't get to enjoy that with us." Then, I questioned, "What if we tell him 'we thought of you while we were enjoying our pumpkin shakes' instead?" Silas insisted that it was TRUE that we thought of him... because we had discussed how we forgot to go there with Grandpa, but he was still pretty sure that Grandpa's feelings might get hurt from missing out on our fun. 

Sometimes, he is a really, Really, REALLY sweet boy!

And those pumpkin shakes truly were DELICIOUS!

Introduction to Battleship

2017: Side by Side Christmas Letter comparison

These two look like brothers! Side-by-side comparison.
{look at those eyes!}

UP NORTH over the weekend

We went "up North" over the weekend, making a long weekend out of it, so that Nana and Papa could go to a funeral while WE entertained Emma and so that the boys could do some fishing with (our) Grandpa Lowell.

Silas learned how to clean fish. Mommy was learning how to cast.

Sydney is good at casting. Silas and Mommy are unpredictable casters, often throwing the line right next to them from releasing the button at the completely wrong time.

On this trip, it was Silas (6) who wanted the pontoon boat to "go slower" when it wasn't out of neutral, which is what had happened years ago when Sydney tried his hand at tubing (while Silas wanted to go faster and faster). This time, Sydney (8) had outgrown the pontoon's rate of speed and had wanted to go "faster, Faster, FASTER!" It was Sydney who held onto the tube and tried to trow the tube from side to side while he was riding it. It was Sydney who stood up while the tube was moving. It was Sydney who threw his hands into the air while standing in the moving tube. It was Sydney who dipped his back half into the water and climbed back onto the tube - while it was moving.

Other highlights of the trip: hearing a loon call out across the lake and having a Bald Eagle fly past the dock while we were out fishing!

Papa showed the boys where he keeps all of the materials for building a canoe. (Silas had asked him more than a year ago if Papa would build HIM a canoe.) Papa has had the materials for 20 years or so and hasn't gotten around to it yet. On this trip, he showed Silas the building plans to build one.

We also taught Nana how to play SkipBo on this trip.

Good times were had by *ALL.

















*except for HE who sleeps in the living room recliner and gives "the stink eye" to everyone for waking him up too early.

NP VAC | Two.

yesterday's adventures took us to the hotel lobby for breakfast. Omelettes, ham slices, waffles, cold cereal, apples, strawberry banana yogurt. Afterwards, we packed up, loaded the car and made our way to the Mammoth Cave National Park.

We got out and took a picture at the park entrance and walked a short (.1 mile) trail to a (closed) cave that had drawn a lot of attention in the past - where a famous spelunker was trapped and had died years ago. We made our way to the Visitor Center (where Mike picked up our Domes and Drips Tour tickets) and we registered for the Junior Ranger program. We ate a picnic lunch out of the back of the car and ventured for our tour. Sydney had the nervous piddles.

We rode a bus to a metal door in the middle of nowhere. There, we climbed down a set of stairs, through a sink hole, under the Earth. Our two hour tour  took us to two chambers with seating benches. One area, they turned off ALL LIGHTS, leaving us in 100% darkness on the count of three. Then, she lit one single candle to illuminate the cave while we listened to her talk. Moments later, she allowed everyone to light the place up with watches and cell phones before turning on the lights again.

Sydney proudly answered the stalactite and stalagmite question for the entire group.

Our seats were directly under fairy ceiling.

We were going to hike, but decided to follow a road to a ferry instead, not knowing how far away it was! Abandoned that idea, made a giant lap in the car around the outside portion of the park and drove back to 'town' for Sydney to run barefoot into Wendy's to go potty. Made our way to the bed and breakfast in the middle of NOWHERE!

Mike took a bath in the oversized whirlpool tub while we sat on the patio reading Land of Stories and petting a small cat. It was difficult to keep the kids from exploring the farm; we kept boots in the car. Eventually, we ALL took a bath. (I miss our whirlpool bath from Dubuque!!!)

Early bedtime. Boys on pull out couch while we had a queen bed. Silliness, fighting over sheets at bedtime.

6:45am as I write this post, the rooster just crowed TWICE while Mike denies hearing it (with a pillow over his head) *I woke to a bright room at 6:08am.

Syd and I are going to let them sleep a while longer.

Cell phone will likely be turned off

 Got a text alert message last night that we have used up 75% of the data plan which bills out on July 3.  We have been Roaming for most of our trip and used the cell phone for navigation purposes.  My battery life continues to be inadequate. I plan to turn the phone OFF and to check it tonight.